Once upon a time, there was a legendary officer of the Royal Navy named Captain Bravado, who was famous across the seven seas for his absolute lack of fear when facing the enemy.
One afternoon, his lookout spotted a notorious pirate ship rapidly approaching. As the crew began to panic, Captain Bravado stood calmly on the deck and bellowed, “Bring me my red shirt!”
The first mate quickly delivered the bright red garment. Wearing it proudly, the Captain led his crew into a fierce battle and completely routed the pirates.
That evening, the victorious sailors gathered on deck to celebrate. One of the men approached the commander and asked, “Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?”
The Captain smiled heroically. “If I were to be wounded in the fight, the red shirt would hide my blood. That way, you men would not lose heart and would continue to fight without fear.”
The sailors gasped in admiration, marveled by the sheer courage of their leader.
At dawn the very next morning, the lookout screamed in terror. He spotted not one, not two, but an entire armada of ten massive pirate ships closing in on them.
The terrified crew turned instantly to their captain, waiting in worshipful silence for his brave orders.
Captain Bravado stared out at the overwhelming force arrayed against his single vessel. Without breaking a sweat, he turned to his first mate and calmly commanded,
“Bring me my brown pants!”
