Why You Should Be Careful on the Roads…
A group of senior citizens were sitting around talking about their *ilm*nts.
“My arms are so weak I can hardly hold this cup of coffee,” said one.
“Yes, I know. My c*tar*cts are so bad, I can’t even see my coffee,” replied another.
“I can’t turn my head because of the *rthr*tis in my n*ck,” said a third, to which several nodded weakly in agreement.
“My bl**d pressure pills make me dizzy,” claimed another.
“I guess that’s the price we pay for getting old,” winced an old man as he shook his head.
“Well, it’s not that bad,” said one woman cheerfully. “Thank God we can all still drive.”
“Hello. Hi Honey. This is daddy. Is mommy near the phone?”
“No Daddy. She is upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.”
After a short pause, Daddy says: “But honey, you don’t have an Uncle Paul.”
“Oh yes, Mommy says I do and he is upstairs with Mommy in the bedroom right now.”
After a short time, Daddy says: “Okay, then this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs knock on the bedroom door, and scream that daddy’s car just pulled into the driveway.”
“Okay Daddy, just a minute.”
A few minutes later the little girl comes back on the phone.
“I did it, daddy.”
“And what happened, honey?” Daddy asked.
“Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now she isn’t moving at all.”
“Oh my God!!!! And what happened to your uncle Paul?”
“He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too. He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool. But I guess he didn’t know that you took out the water last week and cleaned it. He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he is dead.”
*Long pause …*
The daddy says,
“Swimming pool? …. Is this 486-5731?”
